Hey all you fucking pussies out there… for years corporations and MTV have watered down rock music and made it ‘safe for consumers’.  And a lot of fans out there like to come to the shows and talk shit.  That’s fun and all, but don’t think for on second that Kill Allen Wrench is a professional wrestling act.  Try and pic a fight with me and you’ll be inspecting a fucking mic stand, or if you’re lucky you might only get your jaw broken by my hands of steel.

But due to Satanic worship and heavy methamphetamine use, unlike Dimebag Darrell I cannot be killed by any human.

Anybody remember the Guy up in Canada that was supposed to shoot me on stage?

Fuck off pussies.

- ALLEN WRENCH –
international superstar